Category: General

Stop Motion Piano and Drums

by redshift

You don’t need to be able to play the piano or drums to play the piano and drums…

Happy Holidays

by redshift

Merry Christmas to you, dear reader. Halffull has had a tough month, with family illness, personal injury, stress at work, etc. Nevertheless, this is a time to be with your family, forget your troubles, and enjoy the spirit of it all. I wish you all the best.

Pyramid Schemes

by redshift

Why is it that I’m such a magnet for pyramid schemes? I’ve now been approached three separate times about business opportunities that can change your lifestyle if you have dreams and can shift your perspective from factory to passive business model.

Yes, I was actually asked if I have dreams. Today. By an old guy who’s working in the same lumbering corporation as me. I hate to point out the obvious, but if this were such a great opportunity, wouldn’t he be long gone?

I’ll save you 15 minutes. The idea is that when you work for a typical company, you are a factory that merely turns your time into money. When you work passively, you do something now that pays you forever. In essence, you generate money from nothing. It’s like a money tree. Just pick the money off the branches! The money generates itself without any work, so you retire in a few years and still have income. Who wouldn’t like that?

Where, you might ask, does the free money come from? Well, all you have to do is buy beauty products from yourself and convince your friends and family to do the same. You get a portion of every sale. Next, you convince people to enter the same scam that you were suckered into, and you earn a portion of their sales, including the sales of the people they sucker.

Here’s a diagram:

The scheme...

That doesn’t look like any recognizable shape to me…

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Star Trek Inspirational Posters

by blue midget

Star Trek inspirational posters!

Coolest Picture You’ll See This Week

by blue midget

Here’s the coolest picture you’ll see today:  A Mouse Rides a Frog in India Monsoon

Haiku Battle!

by blue midget

HAIKU BATTLE! We are reinstituting haikus! Battle it out in the comment section!  Show us your lyrical stylings. Topic: Operation Removes Lightbulb From Anus

Prelude to the Return – New Rules of Engagement

by blue midget

A few months ago, the regular halffull contributors reached an impasse.  Tension and differing opinions on the site had been mounting for a couple of months, and nasty things were said. 

That’s all over now.  We’re back, but there must be rules. 

1.  There will be no name calling.

2.  As Patrick Swayze says in Road House, “Be nice.”

3.  No hijacking.  In the internet world, if you take someone’s post and derail it to talk about your agenda, it’s called hijacking and it’s considered extremely rude.  Create a new post and talk about whatever is on your mind; don’t steal someone else’s thread.

4.  There is a misnomer that this site is for ranting and fighting and arguing and serious topics.  Not everyone is a ranter or someone who likes to argue.  A lot of it is meant to be humor or general expression. Please don’t read everyone’s posts with a chip on your shoulder.

5.  Everyone is welcome at halffull, except jackasses.

If you’re an old timer who left the site due to inactivity, welcome back to a kinder, gentler halffull… with a side of rant.

The Plug

by blue midget

Tigerblade — Penalty! Offsides on defense, 5 yards!

Here at Halffull, we don’t have a section for other websites that you can link to. Of course, any time I ask redshift to add something to the menu bar, it is met with a steely-eyed glare that says, “You want to make this site look particularly ugly, don’t you?” Of course I don’t but it’s up to our site Nazi to make sure this website looks as clean as possible, in the same way that it’s up to me to ask for eighty million changes. (Speaking of which, what happened to previewing a comment before posting? Huh?) But what can I say? Redshift is an internet-snob and wants to make us as un-blog-like as possible. Besides, most of my posts (especially the news updates) are filled with links anyway.

Due to the barrage of spam we usually get, it’s really hard for me to look through the logs and figure out if we’re being linked or not, since 95% of what is listed is pr0n spam. Either that, or redshift and hulk are lying to me when they say they haven’t been signing halffull up at wwwdotbig-boobs-cheerleaders-kinkymidget-pr0ndotcom. I think they’re lying. You see, I’m addicted to the site stats. I analyze them critically. I make excel charts and bring them to Halffull meetings. And when we dip below 250 visits a day, I freak out. For the past week, our viewings have dipped a bit. I’m not sure where everyone’s gone, but you’re freaking me out, dudes. Is it me? Do I smell? Maybe it’s hulk – I swear that we take him out back and hose him down once in a while. It helps keep the rabid foam around his mouth down to a minimum. Plus, it keeps him going with fresh rants. Never stale, that’s our motto.

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For Those About to Blog, We Salute You

by blue midget

If you checked into the site this weekend, you might have noticed redshift’s post about someone who copied and pasted an entire article from this site and copied it onto their weblog. A couple of hours after he posted it, we found a couple of other people who had also copied entire articles from this site and pasted it onto their weblogs as well.

So, to you who have cut and pasted entire articles onto your site, I have written you a song. Actually, in your honor I have plagiarized the song, but re-written the lyrics for you.

To the tune of “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” by Bobby McFerrin:

Here’s a little blog we wrote
Some noobs want to copy it note for note
Don’t worry… They’re crappy.
Their sites are ugly and have no style
I guess that’s why they copy our files
But don’t worry… They’re crappy.

Don’t worry. They’re crappy!
Don’t worry. They’re crappy!

Can’t think of anything original to say
Just cut and paste because you’re totally ghey
Don’t worry… Be crappy!
This should be corrected in all good time
You’ll learn not to plagiarize in Junior High
Don’t worry… Be crappy!

Don’t worry. They’re crappy!
Ooh! Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh…
Don’t worry.
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh…
They’re crappy.
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh…
Seriously, their sites have no good content!
Ooh! Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh…
So don’t worry.
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh…
Their sites are crappy.
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh…

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Important Dates

by blue midget

Over the next couple of months there are some important things happening. Basically, it’s my chance to tell you what awesome books and games are being released, as well as some holidays and their history – for both U.S. and Canada (Annual Bathtub Races!). I don’t really have a beat on what’s happening for movies because they’re so expensive and so lame as of late that I haven’t really been paying attention. But if you know of any that needs mentioning, post below in the comments section with a date. Or if I missed anything else that you feel is particularly worth noting, comment below.

Wednesday, September 21
ABC’s Lost – That’s tomorrow people, so get on the ball! If you want to catch up, here is a site that gives you a general rundown for each episode. For more details and spoilers, click “Recap” under each episode listing. It’s definitely worth catching up on for tomorrow night.

Monday, September 26
Sly 3: Honor Among Thieves is released for PS2 – Great game for all ages, fun quests and puzzles, a whole lot of fun. Thumbs up for Sly and the gang. I have a friend who has played the last two with his six year old daughter, and confirms that they are age appropriate – for the both of them.

Tuesday, September 27
Family Guy: Stewie Griffin, the Untold Story DVD. Previously unseen material except by those who have been downloading it for free. He commands you to buy it.

Monday, October 3
Oktoberfest Ends — Your mission, should you choose to accept, is to drink as much beer as you possibly can until Oktoberfest ends. Do we have any readers who are beer connoisseurs? Post below with your recommendations and we’ll get it added here.

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