Month: December, 2006

Resume thesaurus usage…

by redshift

Rather than use “responsible” twice in my resume, the wife suggested I check a thesaurus. Therefore, I exercise my dictatorial will over several production systems.

Goat Genital Painter Charged

by blue midget

A man who was caught spray painting three goats’ genitals orange has been charged…  uh…

My Wife Knows Computers

by redshift

When I need a new computer, I rely on my wife. She’s the expert.

wife: what about from Falcon?
wife: I’m totally going to check their site and price out a spectacular computer for you
wife: you’ll be totally amazed at my computer prowess

wife: MACH 5!
wife: the best of the best
wife: and it involves silicon
wife: which is like big boobies
wife: so obviously this is the one you want to get
wife: and I’m going to configure it for you as well

wife: I clicked on the “Bragging Rights” computer
wife: which costs slightly less than your car did.
wife: ok how about the middle one?
wife: it’s like $5k
wife: that’s chump change!
wife: for donald trump.

wife: i selected the chassis with teh FLAMES
wife: what’s a computer chassis?
wife: I don’t know
wife: but this one has FLAMES

Read the rest of this entry »

Math Dunces!

by blue midget

England’s Math Dunces Baffled by Christmas Sale Offers!  “About 14.9 million adults in England do not have the maths skills expected of an 11-year old and may have problems working out even basic deals like “20 percent off” or “buy one, get the second half-price”, the Department of Education and Skills said.”  WTF!

Oh the beemanity

by redshift

Oh the beemanity!

Happy Holidays

by redshift

Merry Christmas to you, dear reader. Halffull has had a tough month, with family illness, personal injury, stress at work, etc. Nevertheless, this is a time to be with your family, forget your troubles, and enjoy the spirit of it all. I wish you all the best.

Top 10 Stories From National Geographic

by blue midget

National Geographic has compiled their top ten news stories from 2006.

Pastrami and Cheesecake Diet

by blue midget

Idiot goes on Atkins Diet, doesn’t know what a diet is for — restricts his eating to mainly pastrami and cheesecake. Tries to sue after his cholesterol shoots up to 246 and must undergo angioplasty surgery. You are what you eat.

The Abridged Script: The Holiday

by blue midget

The Abridged Script released a very short adaptation of “The Holiday.”

MiniPCI for Wireless

by redshift

For the love of God, if you’re having trouble getting your wireless NIC recognized on a linux laptop, make sure you have MiniPCI turned on in your BIOS. Don’t waste half a day like I just did. It’s not worth the massive headache. (On the bright side, I learned a lot.)