A non-techie post, Or: Our Imperialist Friends

by hulk

Ah, Japan. The land of Karoake, video games, shaming, and hentai. Scratch that last one. There’s something about our modern generation that obsesses over the Japanese, to the point where for some reason a large plurality of male geeks seek asian women to a creepy extent. They’ve given us so much, like our entire video game society, they’ve re-inspired american industry, drive the techno-shift to more gadgets and robotic dogs, and anime has become mainstream, especially for small children. They’re also filthy racists.

I had a very interesting breakfast discussion with izzat this morning. We spoke of Gojira, the mighty destroyer, and how the Japanese really wanted those nuclear weapons. We also spoke of Japan trying to seize all the islands around it in a gotta-catch-them-all pokemon craze. Then monster island came up. Izzat asked, “Do they think there are monsters on these islands?” I said, “Yeah, they’re called Koreans.” I didn’t mean I have anything against Koreans. I meant the Japanese do. The cultural hatred is refined there. When Japan conquered Korea they banned the speaking of Korean and used mass-shaming to make Koreans adopt Japanese culture. And now they publish some textbooks for Japanese students saying that the Rape of Nanking never happened and that Korea has islands that belong to Japan. Oh, and Japan wants some Chinese islands too. I think it’s only a matter of time before that flag with all the rays coming from the sun shows up again and we have a new Empire of Japan.

How should we respond? Let’s consider their opponents in this war of words. China, a communist dictatorship with complete control over the media. South Korea, a corrupt regime that is supposedly democratic but doing a poor job of it. The world is composed of several types of nations, but let’s look at three here: The bully nations, the corrupt nations, and the nations that are much better off. We’re among the better off. We can go into a long, long exposition of how many of our leaders suck and the extent to which they suck, but when compared to the rest of the world we have a much more honest government. The bully nations, such as Syria, Iran, Russia, China, and North Korea, are pretty much dictatorships, whether dictatorships of one leader or several, and oppress their people and their neighbors. China is in the process of ruining Hong Kong and has its sights set on Taiwan, Russia is busy trying to control the future of the former Iron Curtain countries and dominate Chechnya, Iran wants nukes so it can threaten Israel, Syria also hates Israel and is pitching a hissy fit about leaving Lebanon where the military is illegally occupying the Bakai Valley, and North Korea starves its own people so Kim Jong Il can buy another fancy car and then send out a press release saying that Americans stole this month’s food shipment. Then you have corrupt nations, such as some South American countries, ours to some extent, Africa, where corruption is mandatory, Malaysia, and South Korea.

Japan wants to fight a corrupt nation and a communist dictatorship. I say let them. Hell, let’s help. Those islands may or may not belong to them. But there are two ways to respond to bullies. Try to understand them, which I would argue is impossible with our balanced systems of government, or fight them at every opportunity we get. I’d rather see Japanese Imperialism than see China grow.

Japan, our Imperialistic friends. Say unto your neighbors, “All your base are belong to us.”