I was growing a bit tired of the development lag in Crunchbang Linux and needed a new distribution. I want a well-built system that doesn’t take too much administration so I can focus on other things. (As you may know, I have a tendency to set up and administer machines for fun, forgetting to do any “real” work on top of it.)

Fedora sounded good. All free software with fairly frequent updates. RPM hell is avoided with Yum. I particularly appreciate the use of the free Nouveau driver for my Nvidia card, and Kernel Mode Setting for a smoother start and fewer hassles.

When it works, Fedora is slick. They’re a bit ahead of Ubuntu in terms of features, with default SELinux, KMS, and better video drivers. Another thing I appreciate is that one of Fedora’s goals is to stay close to upstream. They don’t want to apply 10 patches to every package, preferring to send patches upstream and get down to zero distribution-specific patches if possible.

It’s quick to boot, particularly with KMS. The battery life is about 10-15% longer than with Crunchbang, even with more daemons running.

However, I ran into a couple related bugs that hurt the experience. First, since I migrated my /home partition from a prior system without SELinux, I got a lot of SELinux warnings about my file labels. It told me to use restorecon, but that didn’t fix everything. The solution was to run “sudo touch /.autorelabel” which tells SELinux to relabel the entire system at the next boot.

This was complicated by the fact that HAL couldn’t start due to the SELinux failures. In today’s world of Xorg 1.4+, HAL detects and configures all of your input devices by default.

Without HAL, you have no keyboard or mouse to use in order to fix SELinux labeling. The solution is to log into single-user mode and fix it there. To get into single-user mode in Fedora, turn on your computer and hold Shift after the POST, before you see the Fedora startup screen. This will give you a Grub console. Hit “a” to append to the kernel line, adding a space and a “3″ to the end, then hit enter. (“3″ technically gives you multi-user mode with networking, but the point is that it doesn’t start X.) From there, you can create the autorelabel file or whatever else you need to do.

Note: If you just want X to start without worrying about SELinux, or if you have another problem related to HAL input devices, there’s another option. You can tell X to start even without detecting any devices from HAL. This makes it use the default keyboard and mouse types. Just create an /etc/X11/xorg.conf file with the following contents:

Section "ServerFlags"
  Option "AllowEmptyInput" "off"
EndSection

Summary: I’m going to stick with Fedora for a while because I trust a distribution that likes staying close to upstream.

• Adrenalyn Stack – Berry Energizing: 7/10

  First you get a strong blast of berry flavor, but unfortunately it doesn’t last very long. It fades to a general fruity flavor, similar to the Subzero Red, but has a slightly chalkier texture. I didn’t get an aftertaste, though, so it’s not bad overall.

• Ripped Force – Fruit Punch: 8/10

  This is a good option if you want a strong energy boost. The Ripped Force drinks have 200mg of caffeine along with some blend called Adrenergic Catalyst Technology. I have no idea what that means, but it gives me a bit of the jitters. The Fruit Punch variety is an interesting beast – it has a nice (though very sweet) fruity flavor at first, and then completely disappears, as if you didn’t have a drink at all. Then, there’s a bit of chalky texture, but no real aftertaste. I haven’t had that experience before, but it’s not too bad – a little better than the Berry Energizing flavor.

• Speed Stack – Lemon Lime: 9/10

  I love the flavor on this one. That means something because I normally hate lemon-lime flavors. In this one, the citrus is toned down and it’s fairly sweet – not overly bright. The energy level is fairly strong, as in other Speed Stacks, but not as strong as a Ripped Force. There’s a bit of aftertaste, but not of chemicals, just a slightly sweet flavor.

• Diet Turbo Tea – Peach Tea: n/a

  I don’t like peaches, so I’m not going to give this one a number rating to be fair to people who like peaches. (It would have been a 7.) In essence, this tastes like the lemon Turbo Tea with a bit of peach flavor. Pretty simple. Neither the lemon nor the peach flavors are too strong. You get a faint teabag-like taste, some lemon or peach, and a strong sweetness. If you like sweet tea, you’ll like these.

• Speed Stack – Fruit Punch: 9/10

  This is better than the Ripped Force Fruit Punch – the type of additive really makes a difference in taste. The flavor is more consistent and there’s no chalky aftertaste at all. It has a very slight aftertaste, but just of fruit – similar to the Lemon Lime speed stack but a little deeper. It’s a good balance of fruit and sweet, even though it has no sugar.

• Adrenalyn Stack – Fruit Punch: 6/10

  Tastes a little chalky and bitter compared to the Fruit Punch flavor of Speed Stack or even Ripped Force. The energy boost is really strong, but I’d rather have one of the better-tasting alternatives.

• Diet Turbo Tea – Green Tea: 7/10

  Fairly smooth, like the other Turbo Tea flavors, but the green tea flavor isn’t as good as the lemon. It’s still sweet, but drier and slightly bitter. I wouldn’t have guessed it was green tea if it weren’t on the label, to be honest. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it just doesn’t stand out like the lemon flavor.

• Speed Stack – Grape: 8/10

  This is better than the Ripped Force grape because it’s not as jittery and a bit smoother. Other than that, it’s similar – very sweet, slightly artificial, but if you like grape drinks you’ll probably like this. I happen to like grape, but the flavor could be a bit more mellow.

• Diet Turbo Tea – Raspberry Tea: 9/10

  Another great drink in the Turbo Tea line. It’s very different than the other ABB drinks, though – more like a flavored water than an energy drink. The raspberry flavor itself is great. It’s not even as sweet as the other Turbo Teas. Slightly sweet aftertaste, no chemical flavor, and no chalkiness. One of the better drinks in the line.

• Adrenalyn Stack – Berry Blast: 5/10

  I expected this to be similar to the Berry Energizing flavor of Adrenalyn Stack, but unfortunately it’s a couple steps down. It’s a little chalkier, a little more bitter, and tastes less like berries – almost metallic. I’ve certainly had worse – see my previous energy drinks reviews – but this is the worst from ABB.

Suggestions for ABB: More complex flavors. Packaging that works outside of the gym. They could justify the price if it came across as a high-end energy drink rather than only being for bodybuilders. I love Hugs, but not everyone does.

Free Bonus Review!

• essn Energy: Pomegranate Limeflower – 8/10

  This is another tea-based energy drink, like some of the others I’ve reviewed, but they managed to subdue the green tea / yerba mate flavor with a slightly fruity back-end of pomegranate. The limeflower, which I had never heard of, isn’t very noticeable. It just classes up the tea a bit. The energy boost from this is not strong at all, even though it has 240mg of guarana and a bunch of B vitamins. It only uses evaporated cane juice for sweetness so it falls handily into the “natural” category. This one’s worth a shot, particularly if you like tea, and I can recommend it over most other green tea-based energy products.

Note that free products are great, but they don’t affect the ratings. ABB did well overall, and there are a couple great drinks, but there were still a couple let-downs. I’ll have some suggestions for ABB at the end.

I tried five types of drinks:

• Speed Stack – No sugar, 250mg caffeine total.

  A couple ingredients you can pronounce, a few you can’t. This gives a moderately strong energy boost, and doesn’t seem to affect the flavor much.

• Ripped Force – 350mg of their Adrenergic Catalyst mix, i.e. a bunch of things you can’t pronounce.

  This gives a strong energy boost, but affects the flavor slightly more than Speed Stack. Some of these still got very good scores.

• Diet Turbo Tea – No sugar, 90mg of caffeine and guarana, plus some ginseng.

  A nice light energy boost. Doesn’t affect the flavor.

• Adrenalyn Stack – 200mg caffeine and a whole pile of things you can’t pronounce.

  The most additives, the strongest energy boost. Unfortunately, it really affects the texture and flavor of the drinks. These got some of the lower scores.

• Speed Shot Intensity – No sugar, but a lot of things you can’t pronounce.

  One of the more potent energy mixes. It doesn’t affect flavor consistently – sometimes it’s not noticeable, sometimes it is. See the individual reviews below.

There are a number of flavors for each of the above types. Originally, I was going to review the types and the flavors separately, but they affect each other more than I expected.

So, you get 15 reviews for the price of one!

• Speed Shot Intensity – Subzero Red: 8/10

  This reminds me of a red Hug (the little barrel-drinks) but not as overpoweringly sweet. It’s sugar-free, so I’m not sure how they managed this without getting a chemical aftertaste. The energy boost was noticeable but it didn’t keep me up all night – just what I wanted. I can’t pretend I know what all of the energy supplements in this drink are, but they work well.

• Diet Turbo Tea – Lemon: 9/10

  Tasty, natural tea with added guarana for energy. There’s only 90mg of caffeine total, so if your only goal is energy, try one of the stronger alternatives. The lemon flavor is balanced correctly for my taste. There’s a bit of tang from something – either the ginseng or the sucralose, I think. No chemical aftertaste. The tea flavor could be a bit more pronounced, but overall it’s quite tasty.

• Speed Stack – Lemon Tea: 8/10

  The flavor base is the same as the Turbo Tea, but this one has a much more potent energy mix. It masks the tea flavor slightly, but it still doesn’t taste like chemicals. There’s a slight sticky, sweet aftertaste. I’m impressed that they’re able to make these drinks powerful without the strong overtones of common energy drinks.

• Ripped Force – Grape: 7/10

  Similar to the Subzero Red, this flavor reminds me of a Hug. If you remember Hugs from when you were a kid, you can imagine these drinks. Sweet, slightly artificial fruity flavor. Not quite as sweet as a true Hug, which is a good thing. The energy boost is similar to the Speed Shot and Speed Stack, but a bit stronger. I’m a little jittery.

• Speed Shot Intensity – Purple Frost: 6/10

  Tastes like the Grape flavor of Ripped Force, but you can taste the added chemicals in this concentrated form. It’s not too strong, but since it’s noticeable, it detracts a little bit. The energy boost is on the strong side.

Stay tuned for part 5, the conclusion of the ABB reviews!

Sobe Power: 8/10

This is a nice break from the artificial tastes of typical energy drinks. It’s a standard fruit punch flavor but there’s no aftertaste or any hint of additives. It’s a little on the sweet side, but at least that comes from natural sugar. Don’t rely on it for an energy spike because the additives are relatively minor and you’ll have a slight sugar crash. High marks for taste and natural ingredients.

Steaz Orange: 8/10

Steaz is going for an earthier approach to orange flavor with the addition of yerba mate. If you’ve had yerba mate you’ll know what I mean. I don’t like pure yerba mate (or some other green teas) because it tastes a little like grass. However, adding a touch of it to orange juice is a nice combination and balances the sweetness. There’s also a hint of acai, and it’s lightly carbonated. If you want something a little sweeter, Kaboom Orange doesn’t have any tea and tastes more like pure juice. Steaz is good for a change if you like yerba mate.

Emergen-C Health and Energy Water – Dragon Fruit: 7/10

Emergen-C is the strange cousin of Vitamin Water that’s quiet at the family reunions. It’s definitely more of an enhanced water than an energy drink, so if you need a powerful kick, look elsewhere. There are a few things you have to look past – it has a disconcerting pale yellow color, it smells a bit off, and it’s a little thicker than water should be. If you ignore that, it has a nice, subtle fruit flavor and 16 times the vitamins. Seriously – up to 1660% of the daily value of some vitamins like Vitamin C, hence its name. It also has “Okinawa Deep Sea Minerals,” whatever that means. (They might be the culprit for the thickness.) A bottle was pretty cheap and it’s one of the healthiest options I’ve reviewed, while still offering a little sweetness. Worth a shot.

Sobe Energy: 8/10

There’s a hint of creaminess to go with the citrus flavor. The citrus is mostly orange but you can taste some others that add a bit of depth. (The label says lemon, cherry, and elderberry.) It’s definitely on the sweet side since they added sugar to the fruit juice – 66g per bottle total. That’s usually not necessary if you’re using good juice. Otherwise, it’s good – mostly natural, smooth, and the creaminess is a great addition.

Red Bull Sugar Free: 4/10

Tastes like Rockstar Sugar Free, but a little less sweet, so it’s not like being hit in the face with a five pound bag of Smarties. That’s a good thing, and it gains a whole point for it, but this is still very run of the mill. I suppose I should have expected that with Red Bull being one of the original energy drinks. If you want to imagine the taste, just water down some sour Smarties. On the plus side, they carve a bull out of the can’s tab. (Not worth it.)

Rockstar Juiced – Guava: 6/10

So close and yet so far away. This could be really good if it weren’t so carbonated and sticky. The flavor is nice – the guava itself is soothing – but the artificial texture throws it off. It also tastes worse and worse as it warms up. I have to give this drink some credit – it’s much better than the other Juiced flavor, mango/orange/passionfruit. I’ll save that for another review, to be written when I’m depressed.

Vitamin Water 10 – Energy: 8/10

Very light and refreshing citrus flavor. The difference between Vitamin Water and Vitamin Water 10 is that the newer 10 version uses stevia as a sweetener instead of sugar. This gives it less calories, a sweeter taste, and (unfortunately) a little bit of sweet aftertaste. High marks for taste and health benefit, but I have to take away a couple points because of the slight aftertaste and because I wish the citrus were a bit more pronounced.

• Arizona Green Tea Energy Drink: 2/10

  Tastes like honey. Honey that just fell out of a bee’s ass. A homeless bee that hasn’t showered in a year. Add in a little spoiled cough syrup. Tea could be a great base for an energy drink, but this is not the right tea, nor was it sweetened properly.

• Monster M-80: 6/10

  80% juice. Tastes like passion fruit, pineapple, and guava. Not bad, but a little too tangy from the pineapple. Tastes a little like cough syrup. In fact, I just had some cough syrup, and it mixes well.

• Sobe Essential – Berry Pomegranate: 8/10

  Only 7% juice, but very tasty. Raspberry and pomegranate flavor, lightly carbonated. It does have a hint of tanginess, whether from the fruit or the additives I can’t tell. A little too much sugar to be considered one of the “natural” alternatives, but it’s a great option.

• Rockstar Sugar Free: 3/10

  Tastes like carbonated Smarties. Drinks shouldn’t taste like Smarties. I really don’t know what else to say about this one, except that Smarties are a lot better.

• Full Throttle Zero: 7/10

  Citrusy, but it doesn’t hit you over the head. Overall it’s pretty nice, but it does have a little bit of funny taste from the additives, and I don’t know who needs so many additives in the first place. Each of the mainstream energy drink brands has a “standard flavor”, and this is probably the best of that lot.

• No Fear Sugar Free: 7/10

  Mostly grape, a little blueberry taste. Tastes similar to the Full Throttle Zero except for the choice of fruit. A good option but a little artificial.

• Amp Sugar Free: 7/10

  Tastes like bubble gum. Actually pleasant if you like the idea of drinking bubble gum. Not as many additives as some of the other energy drinks, and has no unpleasant aftertaste. Just bubble gum!

• Rockstar Zero Carb: 5/10

  Slightly bitter, moderate carbonation. I can’t pick out the fruit flavors because it’s a bit medicinal, and they don’t list which fruits make up the “natural flavors.” I appreciate the lack of aftertaste, but it’s still a bit sticky and artificial. The No Fear Sugar Free has a similar fruity taste but it’s definitely a step up from this.

• Lo-Carb Monster: 5/10

  Tastes incredibly similar to Rockstar Zero Carb. Really – just reread the last entry. Same artificiality and almost the same taste. I suspect they come from the same original manufacturer. It does add a few extra vitamins, but this is another one you could skip. Mixxd is the best of the Monsters so far.

• Amp with Black Tea: 4/10

  This doesn’t taste as spoiled as the Amp with Green Tea, but it does have the unpleasant tea/syrup combination of the Arizona Green Tea energy drink. It leaves you with an awful aftertaste for quite a while. The only saving grace is that the honey flavor isn’t as strong as the Arizona, which makes the overall flavor a bit more like a regular Amp… but why not just drink something else?

The goal: I want a drink that will keep me conscious and productive at work, without having too much sugar. I’m not a health nut, I’m just afraid of the diabetus. So, I found all of the natural/sugar-free energy drinks I could and slurped them down over the last three weeks. So you don’t have to.

• Bawls Exxtra: 7/10

  Slightly fruity flavor. If you like the Bawls taste, you’ll like this; it’s similar but more powerful. It has slightly less impact than Bawls because of the change in sweetener.

• Bawls Cherry: 8/10

  One of the best cherry sodas I’ve ever had. Doesn’t taste like an energy drink, just a good cherry soda (even though it’s artificial.) If that’s your thing, definitely try it out.

• Kaboom Orange Buzzzz: 9/10

  Excellent – tastes very much like orange juice. No detectable flavor from the energy components. Has a lot of vitamins and is organic. My favorite so far.

• Rumba energy juice: 8/10

  Not quite as good a taste as Kaboom Orange, but still good and 100% juice. Tastes like canned OJ – slightly watered down and lacking punch, but still refreshing and you can’t taste the energy additives at all. Other fruit flavors are faint.

• Red Bull Cola: 8/10

  The cola flavor tastes like Coke but more natural. Uses real sugar and no chemicals at all. Much lighter in color than normal cola. Has caffeine and no other energy additives – fine by me. Basically a really good cola with a bit more pep. Very slight (natural) aftertaste.

• Monster Mixxd: 7/10

  30% juice. The ingredients say the fruit juice comes from apples and grapes, which is pretty accurate if you can imagine the combination. Pretty tasty. A bit healthier than a straight energy drink but still has all the sugar and chemicals.

• Monster Khaos: 5/10

  50% juice. This time there are more fruit juices combined, but they don’t add up. The strongest fruit flavor for me is the peach. It comes across as medicinal, and I don’t want carbonated medicine. The juice can’t save this from mediocrity.

• Amp with Green Tea: 3/10

  This is not natural. It tastes like spoiled grapes and rotten herbs. There is absolutely no green tea flavor whatsoever, and by “yuzu” I think they meant “motor oil.” This has very few redeeming qualities – they added a few extra vitamins, and I’ve had a drink or two in my life that tasted worse.

• Mountain Dew Voltage: 5/10

  So highly carbonated it’s screaming to get out of the bottle. Try to avoid getting any in your mouth when it does come out of the bottle – you’ll thank me later. It tastes like a blue raspberry freezer pop. I like freezer pops, but the blue raspberry ones are the worst in the box, and I wouldn’t want to drink it.

• Rockstar Punched – Acai berry: 8/10

  Surprisingly nice. I wasn’t expecting much but it’s actually very fruity (in a good way) from the acai berry. I think the “citrus” name is a bit inaccurate; it’s more subtle and flavorful. Still has a bit of energy drink aftertaste so it can’t get the highest marks, but it’s definitely tasty.

Update: Here’s part two!

My goal: a tasty, reasonably healthy snack for breakfast that’s easily transported to work and doesn’t require preparation.

• Chocolate Chip – 5/10

  Not very chocolaty; they taste more like a chemically processed health food bar. No actual chocolate chips – or they’re too small to see. If you’re after chocolate flavor, try something else.

• Chocolate Brownie – 8/10

  Much more chocolaty than the Chocolate Chip. Tastes less like health food and more like a snack. And yet it’s still healthy… Worth a shot for anyone.

• Oatmeal Raisin Walnut – 6/10

  There’s a hint of walnut in this one but hardly any raisin. The oatmeal flavor is very weak – it tastes more like the standard Clif mix. These bars really need something to cover up the default Clif flavor because I’m not finding it pleasant.

• Chocolate Almond Fudge – 5/10

  I’m noticing a trend with some of the bars – they smell stronger than they taste. This one smells strongly of almond but there’s only a slight hint of almond in the taste. There’s not much fudge flavor at all – nothing like the chocolate brownie. Slightly better than the Chocolate Chip because of the extra flavor, but otherwise the same.

• Banana Nut Bread – 6/10

  Strong smell of banana, but the taste isn’t authentic. It has small bits of chocolate to try to help the flavor along, but it either needs more chocolate bits or better banana flavor. It fades into standard (strange, tangy) Clif flavor while chewing.

• Blueberry Crisp – 7/10

  “Blueberry” doesn’t belong in the title, but “Crisp” is it’s strong point. It doesn’t have the faintest hint of blueberry. It does add some larger nuts to the basic Clif formula, which help to add crunch and mask some of the regular Clif flavor.

• Carrot Cake – 8/10

  They actually got the the texture right – it’s reminiscent of real carrot cake. I’m not sure how they did that in a plastic-wrapped product, but it was a nice surprise. The taste is pleasant and fairly subtle, and doesn’t have as much of the standard Clif flavor, even without another strong flavor to mask it.

My favorites were definitely the Chocolate Brownie and the Carrot Cake. They had the most authentic flavors and textures, and I could probably eat them every morning for a while without getting bored. The others were forgettable because the base Clif formula is pretty gross and they didn’t do anything to separate themselves from it.

Note: I wasn’t able to test any peanut butter-flavored bars because of the peanut butter recall. When more flavors come in, I’ll make another post with my impressions.

Technically, Exherbo is most similar to Gentoo. It inherited some of Gentoo’s parts, and a fair bit of the mentality. You get deep configuration and understanding of your system. In fact, it’s required for use. If you don’t understand your hardware and the basic components of a Linux system, you’ll have a hard time getting it running. Don’t let that scare you off, though; it’s an excellent platform for learning.

That said, it’s obviously meant for a subset of users. Let me describe some things about me that led me to Exherbo. I like to understand everything that’s going on at some level of depth. I can’t rest until I understand, and I mean that literally – I’ve been up late most of the week trying to get my wireless working perfectly. I also like a lean system without a lot of moving parts that I didn’t ask for. It’s harder to understand what you don’t know is there. I appreciate performance and stability, like anyone, but I believe they are borne of simplicity.

I’m a long-time Gentoo user, and this reminds me of the early days of Gentoo before the committee. Progress is rapid and parts of the machine are being swapped out as it runs. The developers are passionate about what they’re doing, and if you agree with them, it’s a great place to be. One of the more vocal developers, Ciaran McCreesh, is a good example. He comes off as abrasive, but take his messages without emotion. I usually agree with him and he definitely writes good code. (He’s also a vim devotee.)

If you just want things to work, don’t use it. In fact, until last week, they actively discouraged anyone from using it. That warning has been lifted since I did my install, and they even added some user documentation. (Think of it as crib notes for your install – Gentoo’s handbook run through a compactor.) If you want to learn how your system works, from the hardware all the way to the user environment, give Exherbo a shot.

A side benefit of building a Linux system from scratch (with any low-level distribution) is that you get to see all the amazing work put forth in the free software community.

8. Super Monkey Ball: Banana Blitz: 1/5

This is another easy place to start, because Super Monkey Ball is terrible. For your own sanity and wallet, do not even rent this game.

Super Monkey Ball has two game modes. The first is classic Monkey Ball, where you roll your crazy little monkey down a Marble Madness-esque course encased in a balloon. The only challenge is in trying to master the frustrating controls. Level design is boring, frustrating, or both.

They didn’t even make the Wii remote enjoyable to use in such an obvious avenue for motion sensitivity. The controls were fairly responsive, to the point of oversensitivity, but were not customizable. You have to hold the remote pointing toward the television, as opposed to sideways like an NES controller, which would make much more sense to me. It became uncomfortable after only two levels. On top of the discomfort, your wrist is just not designed to make quick movements in the manner they intend, which could even lead to RSI.

So, let’s ignore the first game mode. The second is even worse. Sad, really. It’s a collection of 50 minigames a la Wii Sports or Wii Play, though shorter, not replayable, and less fun in general. In fact, most of the games don’t even behave as the (briefly shown, opaque) instructions claim. Several don’t work at all. I can only remember two or three of the 50 minigames. My only guess is that the “monkey ball” portion was in development when an executive saw the success of minigame-style Wii titles and insisted on their inclusion. The result is truly painful.

9. Super Smash Bros. Brawl: 4.5/5

Great little fighter. I don’t think Brawl is as expansive as most other reviews say, but there is a lot of content. The main fighting mode is great. There are at least 40 characters and 50 levels, and with the level editor you can make interesting new ones. If you’re new to Super Smash Bros., you might be surprised to find that fights aren’t just melee combat. Levels come alive and present various obstacles throughout the fight. They’re also much larger than in most fighting games and present multiple areas and tiers for variety. Many aspects of the rules of combat can be adjusted to your liking. Some are serious, some for fun, like wearing a flower on your head or breathing fiery curry breath.

On top of standard combat, one of my favorite challenges is the Event mode. There are different events for single player and multiplayer, and there’s a good amount of variety in the goals. One mode involves killing 50 enemies in one loop around the course. Another involves beating all of the original Smash Bros. characters in one round. Another involves beating colored koopa troopas in a certain order. They’re challenging and they offer difficulty levels and trophies to keep you coming back.

There is a single player mode, called Subspace Emissary, but it feels… odd. It’s reminiscent of an old-school platformer with new graphics. Honestly, this is my only complaint about the game, and it’s why I can’t give a perfect 5/5 score. There just isn’t enough unique about this mode to keep my interest. It has its moments – I particularly like the Donkey Kong levels – but there are just as many annoying moments. You can’t pick your characters for a large portion of the mode, and you often get stuck with Pit. Since Pit is a new addition to Brawl, I can understand the reason for this, but he’s also not as polished as the returning characters and tends to annoy.

There are a few other mini-modes, like a coin-shooting game and sticker collection, but they’re not really worth discussing. Feel free to ignore them and enjoy the Brawl and Event modes, which really are classic. Recommended for almost anyone, though I’d strongly advise you play with a friend or three.

10. Pinball Hall of Fame: The Williams Collection: 4/5

I love this game. I am a pinball freak, and The Williams Collection has amazing physics and camera control, two key elements to replicating the pinball experience. The only reason I can’t give it a 5 is the fact that you must be a pinball fan to appreciate it, and that if you’re not, the content might seem a bit light. You do have to practice quite a bit to get all of the content out of this title.

There are 10 tables ranging from 1970 to the mid-90′s. They’re all well-selected and offer a lot of challenges to master. Once you complete the standard set of 6 challenges on a table, you open up the “Wizard Challenges” that are significantly harder. These often involve hitting a perfect streak of targets to get the ultimate jackpot of the table. Not to be taken lightly. I’ve only managed to complete all of the wizard challenges on one table, Space Shuttle, but I’m definitely working toward the rest. Completing challenges earns you credits that you can use to play other tables or unlock tables for free play. Highly recommended if you’re a pinball fan, and recommended for anyone to see if you secretly have the bug.

11. Trauma Center: Second Opinion: 4/5

I hope you don’t have an aversion to blood and guts, or you’ll miss out on a fun, original game. You play a surgeon moving up in the world of Creepy Anime City (paraphrased) where everyone acts like a saint except you. You feel the need to leave patients hurting in the OR without being fully treated, or to be rude to your helpful nurse, or to ignore the advice of your elders. Ahh, Japan.

Anyway. The gameplay of Trauma Center is strong. It’s a lot of fun to figure out the different medical challenges, and the controls on the Wii are fantastic. The analog stick on the nunchuck picks your instrument, and the remote serves as your operating hand inside the patient. There’s a puzzle element to figuring out which tools should be used when. If you screw up, you have a bit of a chance to recover through the use of stimulants and supernatural powers (again, it’s Japan), but the difficulty ramps up until you really need to know your tools intimately.

My only nitpick, aside from the bizarre story, is the stage where you’re forced to defuse a bomb. It’s out of place and far more difficult than the stages leading up to it. Recommended unless you have a serious aversion to blood.

12. Wii Play: 3/5

Wii Play is a hit-or-miss minigame collection that you can get for $10 if you buy a remote. ($50 instead of $40, basically.) Since it’s hit-and-miss, I’ll devote the most times to the good bits.

• Good minigames:
  • Shooting Range, i.e. Duck Hunt. I wish they had just called it Duck Hunt and made everyone happy. Classic shooting game, but if you want more, get Link’s Crossbow Training.
  • Laser Hockey. A nice air hockey clone with the addition of paddles you can rotate.
  • Billiards. Simple but fun, if you like shooting pool. You can even impart english. Minor control issues, but not enough to hamper play.
  • Tanks! The best of the bunch. Reminiscent of Combat on the Atari, with the addition of mines and better cannons. Surprisingly addictive.
• Not-so-good minigames:
  • Find Mii. Ugh. I suppose this is the best version of a “find the matching pictures” game I’ve played, but still boring.
  • Table Tennis. Not terrible, but there’s nothing to the game except moving your paddle left and right to hit the ball. No real use of the motion controls in the remote.
  • Pose Mii. Ugh. Painful to play. You have to line up goofy-looking bodies, attached to your Mii’s head, into patterns on the screen. Not much more to be said, aside from Ugh.
  • Fishing. Could have been better. The graphics are cheesy and the fish look like construction paper. The controls aren’t as responsive as they could be.
  • Charge! A silly game where you ride a cow around a track and try to jump obstacles. Fun to watch, but gets old fast.

Recommended only because it’s $10 if you’re getting a remote anyway.

13. Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles: 4/5

If you like rail shooters, this is a great way to bring the genre into your home. Resident Evil is the perfect setting for a shooter like this, and the Wii has the natural choice for control mechanisms. You play through part of the story from the first few Resident Evil games, blasting your way through zombies with the Wii remote. You shake the remote to reload, and you can evade some enemy attacks by performing the right motion when the warning pops up. The controls are good and the weaponry feels just right. You can always go back to levels to improve your rating, and single-player side stories will open up as you progress through the main chapters. Recommended if you’re a fan of shooters or of Resident Evil in general.

14. Wii Built-ins – Everybody Votes, Check Mii Out, Forecast, and News channels: 3/5

These are all free channels that either come with the Wii or are downloadable from the Wii Shop channel. News and Forecast (weather) are actually well-made, and have impressed some of my visitors, but they’d be a bit better if they opened quicker. You only get a brief summary when you select the channel, at which point you have to wait for the full program to load to get the 5-day forecast or world news. Handy to have in the living room if your computer is elsewhere.

Everybody Votes is a simple channel where you can vote on random questions of the day; sort of a democracy of useless trivia. Check Mii Out is a bit more interesting. You can submit the Miis you’ve created to various contests. For example, there have been contests to create Mario, Cleopatra, and opera singer lookalikes. Hey, it’s free, what were you expecting? You could probably skip these and lead a full life.

Next in line: Metroid Prime 3: Corruption and The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess. These are two of my favorite franchises and I saved them until after I completed Super Mario Galaxy. Once I’ve played through, I’ll let you know my opinion and whether they live up to the legacy.

How about fourteen Wii game reviews?!

1. Super Mario Galaxy: 5/5

This is an easy place to start because the game is delightful. It’s a true spiritual successor to Super Mario 64 and is every bit as fun to play.

The addictive elements are there – quick gameplay, content that’s always fresh, beautiful graphics, and intuitive controls. You can play for 10 minutes and feel a sense of accomplishment by getting a star, or you can play for hours and complete whole worlds.

The controls are intuitive, even in a vast 3d setting, and the levels are forgiving if you misstep. Motion controls are used just enough not to be cumbersome. You point at the screen with the remote to shoot projectiles, and shake the remote to spin Mario like a top, which is now one of the main gameplay mechanics.

The game design is classic Miyamoto. You never repeat the same puzzle twice. Each level feels like a new adventure. Visually, you can see the trend towards a younger audience that started way back with the Yoshi games on SNES , but it’s almost endearing. Plus, if you really don’t like the children’s stories, they’re entirely optional. You still get a great game. Highly recommended if you’ve ever liked a Mario title.

2. Warioware: Smooth Moves: 4/5

Reviews of Warioware have been polarized. Metacritic shows generally favorable reviews, but scores range from 56 to 100 and user reviews average 6.5. I assume this is because of the nature of the game – a sort of extreme version of the minigame trend we see with many Wii games.

Personally, I like minigames, whether standalone or baked into full games. They give you an opportunity to try different things at a rapid pace. Warioware takes this to the extreme with just about the shortest games imaginable – 3 to 5 seconds on average. It gives you just enough time to get a sense of what’s going on, then you immediately have to solve the puzzle by moving the remote in whatever seems like the correct way. There are so many microgames that they built a full game on 3-5 second experiences. Sure, it won’t last you as long as Super Mario Galaxy, but it’s the type of game you can return to many times because you definitely won’t remember all of the challenges.

The games are based on a set of controller styles, such as “The Elephant,” which involves you holding the remote straight out from your nose like a trunk, or “The Waiter,” where you balance the remote flat on the palm of your hand. You have to change styles very quickly between microgames , particularly near the end of the game where you’re only given a second or two to change posture. This keeps the energy high and keeps the strange looks coming.

The game was challenging enough to stay interesting for the 3-4 hours it took to beat. (This does not include any time going back and replaying the games.) For the most part, the controls worked as expected, though there were one or two games (out of around 100) that I couldn’t figure out. Recommended if you like minigames and have a sense of humor.

3. Rockstar Games presents Table Tennis: 2/5

I’ve been a table tennis fan my entire life. Whether you’re a fan or not, this game disappoints. For the newcomer, it’s overly complex and doesn’t offer enough introductory content to get you interested. For the veteran, the controls seem awkward and arbitrary, which makes the game frustrating and, ultimately, boring.

There is a short series of tutorials that teaches you the basics of play. However, the controls and the ball mechanics seem like they were designed by different people. The ball mechanics, by which I mean the way the game simulates ball motion, are complex and fairly accurate. The controls, on the other hand, feel mushy and inaccurate. I just couldn’t get the game to perform the moves I wanted. When I contort my arm to make the ball hit the back left corner of the table, while holding several buttons to impart the proper spin, it would just drop flat on the wrong side of the table. Meanwhile, your avatar is blocking your view of the action.

Frustrating. Not recommended unless you really, really like table tennis and are willing to put up with the warts. The tennis game in Wii Sports is more fun and offers better modes of play. Speaking of which…

4. Wii Sports: 4/5

Wii Sports is the pack-in title for the Wii, so anyone with a Wii should have played it and formed their own opinion. My opinion, being a fan of all the sports in the game, is that it’s a perfect complement to the spirit of the system, and that the games are more addictive than many you’d have to shell out real money for.

My personal favorite is Tennis. The controls are amazingly responsive for being so simple. The practice mode is replayable for hours. Each sport has three practice modes of increasing difficulty, and once you get good at Tennis, you can play the third practice mode (hitting the ball to specific targets) for quite a while without stopping.

Golf, Boxing, Baseball, and Bowling are equally fun. Each has simple controls, fun graphics (play with your own Mii!), and lots of replayability. The only reason I’m not giving the game a 5 is that you might be less interested in the game if you’re not interested in these sports. Still, it’s a great title, and one you can play with almost anyone. My game-confused family has proven that.

5. The Godfather: Blackhand Edition: 3/5

The Godfather is a GTA-style open-world game where you complete missions for The Don’s organization and try to move up in the world. The story is recognizable if you’re a fan of the movies. It’s not a rip-off, but rather a side plot that takes slight liberties with the movie canon to fit a new character into the scene.

First, the good: the controls are very good. You use the remote and nunchuck to simulate your mobster’s hands, with which you can punch, grapple, choke, and throw your enemies in old New York. These actions are handled well and feel intuitive and realistic. You probably don’t need a manual to tell you how to choke someone or throw them into the wall. The remote also serves as a pointing device for your many guns, if you choose to enter free-aiming mode. Over time, you build up the repertoire of moves you can perform.

And then, of course, the bad: the storyline does get a bit dull when your mentor, Luca Brasi, dies within the first few minutes of the game. You’re left on your own to figure out the city, and the game does not guide you. Normally in a open-world game this would be fine, but you at least expect side missions to keep the action moving. There are very few. Even when you’re told about upcoming story events you’re left without a clue of how to find them, and when you do, they don’t always work. It can be quite frustrating. After the second occurrence of a missing plot event, I was ready to give up on the game.

It’s worth a rental, at least to check out the motion-sensitive street fighting controls.

6. Link’s Crossbow Training: 4/5

Link’s Crossbow Training is offered as a pack-in game with the Wii Zapper, a piece of plastic that combines your Wii remote and nunchuck into a stylized gun. I would highly recommend skipping the Wii Zapper altogether and picking up a used copy of Link’s Crossbow Training from your local game store for $5 like I did. It doesn’t need the Wii Zapper and actually plays very well with the remote and nunchuck alone.

It’s a simple target shooting game with bits of adventure shooting and boss fighting thrown in. You can earn medals on each of 9 levels by shooting the various Zelda-themed monsters and targets. In some stages, longer hit streaks will multiply your score, so there’s an element of strategy in choosing whether to try hitting every target or to take your time and go for the big points in the center of the targets. In other stages, you need to fire as fast as possible to take down enemies advancing on you from all directions. In others, you use the analog stick to move around a stage and track down enemies hiding on roofs and in buildings.

For $5, you can’t go wrong. Recommended if you like target shooting in any capacity.

7. Madden NFL ’08: 3/5

I have a long history with Madden games, starting with Madden ’92 on Sega Genesis, so I was interested to see how they’d handle the jump to the Wii . In some respects it was successful, and I enjoyed playing through some of the new training modes. Overall, though, it was a disappointment to see the many downsides overpower the fun of shaking your Wiimote around to tackle someone.

I’m actually not a big football fan, so football games have to deliver on gameplay to hook me. One of Madden ’08′s new features, a single-player career mode, seems to focus more on a corny life simulator than fun content. You spend more time in a tiny apartment with all of four selectable targets than you do on the field. You actually have to tell the game to advance day by day to get to the next event, whether it’s training, an interview, a draft, or a game. The only options of value are games and the training mini-games, which you can play separately. I’d rather not virtually tear days off a calendar, but thanks anyway, EA.

If you ignore the useless new features, the gameplay is fairly entertaining. You can shake the remote and nunchuck in certain ways to enhance tackles, catch passes, or run past defenders. Doing a Power Tackle in two-player mode by punching your fists forward and shouting is endlessly entertaining. The controls aren’t as intuitive as I’d like, though, and it took some time to adjust to the different play style.

Overall, I think the Wii controls and training modes bring some life back to Madden, and the controls simplify things a bit for new users. You might have to ignore a lot of junk on the way, though. Recommended for die-hard Madden or NFL fans, or as a rental for someone who wants to try out the controls in a sports game with friends.

Stay tuned for Part Two, another seven games, coming soon.

Update: Here’s part two.