Deet! Doot! Deet! Doot! Deet!
The following takes place between 10:00pm and 11:00pm.
Jack Bauer is driving down a dark road in Los Angeles at nighttime in a black SUV. It is very late. Despite it being the city of Los Angeles, there are no lights. Everything is very, very dark and ominous. He picks up his cell phone and makes sure you understand that it is Motorola or AT&T or something he can kick a terrorist’s ass with. Mashing a speed dial button with extreme urgency, he slams the phone up to his ear.
The urgency of the situation causes him to scream into the phone. “Chloe! It’s Jack!”
“Jack?” Chloe asks, annoyed. “Why are you shouting? I am indoors and you are in a luxurious 2007 bulletproof SUV and it’s totally quiet inside. With my sophisticated technology I can tell that you don’t even have the radio on.”
“What technology?” Jack shouts.
“I can’t tell you that. It’s classified. Need-to-know basis only, and you don’t need to know for this mission,” she says rather snottily. “So why are you shouting at me if you can hear my snideness so clearly?”
“I don’t know,” Jack rasps, still screaming into her ear.
“Well my ears are bleeding so I’m going to transfer you to Mr. Buchanan. Thanks a lot, jerk – I mean, Jack.”
“Chloe, wait! I need a throat lozenge, and for some reason I am gasping for breath as if I’ve just run a triathlon! Of course this makes no sense because I’ve been reclining in this very comfortable SUV for the past fifteen minutes. At any rate, I need you to triangulate my position and send a team to bring me some Ricola!”