Before I begin, allow me to state that this anecdote really does have a point. Really. I promise.
So my little sister and I are walking today and we see these two guys riding on one bike. They’re not doing it the “smart” way, where one sits on the seat and the other on the handrail. No, one is sitting on the front of the seat, pedalling, and the other is sitting on the back of the seat, bending his knees so that his feet hang over the back wheel. And my sister, Katie, and I look at them and say to each other, “My, isn’t that unsafe?”
At this point, the second rider slides off the back of the seat, landing himself on the spinning back wheel. Ouch. And from his high-pitched squeal, it doesn’t sound like he landed too comfortably. Considering the direction in which the wheel was turning, he probably ended up with his balls caught between the wheel and the seat. Katie and I die laughing (because we’re women and we realize that we have no concept whatsoever of how that might feel), and make jokes about how that guy will likely never be able to have children after that mishap.
Sadly, this immediately makes me think about evolution…
Now, think about this. Testicles are outside of the body because sperm needs to be produced at a temperature slightly lower than that of the human body. But maybe that’s not the only reason. While they’re out there, they’re also far more susceptible to permanant injury.
That guy riding on the back of the bike was clearly an idiot. Maybe it’s a good thing that he might not be able to procreate and pass on his stupid-gene to his offspring. When you think of it like that, testicles are really an ingenius evolutionary control device.
Wow, my respect for the male anatomy is now that much greater!
You could apply the same logic to men who run with the bulls in Spain, or who play “Rochambeau”… yes, they’re daring (or just stupid), and they may render themselves childless, and that may be okay for the rest of humanity.
Having the testicles be susceptible to injury could also prove helpful in thwarting sexually aggressive men, although sadly, most victims of sexual aggression aren’t able to take advantage of this weakness in the male anatomy, except in B-movies starring Angelina Jolie (or whoever) as a butt-kicking spandex-wearing superwoman.
August 19th, 2004, at 9:00 am #What women fail to understand is that such an injury rarely renders a man “childless”. Natural selection cannot think, it merely cuts out any bad genes and undesirable qualities that inhibit a species’ chances to reproduce. The examples mentioned do neither of those. The testicles hang outside the body simply to regulate their temperature.
Being female, you will not understand what it feels like to be hit or kicked in the testicles, or how different it is for each individual male…
Maybe you should leave this argument to the professionals.
September 22nd, 2005, at 6:35 pm #